Domestic Executive

Living life in the slow lane since 2006

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Lessons in light and life

How would you feel if someone suggested visiting a squatters commune to your touring itinerary? Probably not that enthralled, at least that would have been my reaction.

But when a fellow photographer suggests a detour to make the most of the gorgeous evening light, I’m unpacking the camera bag right away. As we pulled into Finn Slough (pronounced Finn Slew) close to where my friend Sabrina lives near Vancouver I was slightly baffled by what we had come to see.

Depending on who you speak to, Finn Slough is either a squatters commune , historical fishing village, artistic or alternative living community. Truth lies somewhere among all of those definitions thrown in with a touch of enchanting magic, or maybe that was just the light.

Nestling into the landscape of the Fraser River, the residents of Finn Slew have built on the legacies of the first Finnish settlers in 1880s. They live in houses on stilts or in former net lofts above the river in tune with nature of this coastal environment. They are also fighting to gain their rights to a Crown lease who owns the land to make their residency bona-fide and beat away property developers hungry to turn Finn Slough into a modernised version of this riverside idyll complete with condos and other conveniences of modern life.

Finn Slough is one of the most photographic landscapes I’ve visited in a while. It’s tumble-down style belies a thoughtful ironic sense of humour that playfully makes fun of mainstream living.  See this house and doorway below, it’s not what it seems.

finn-slough-vancouverThe evening light waits for no-one so we made the most of seeing as much as we can in the golden hour. It’s not hard to see how this would be a haven for local photographers to visit often. It felt good to have a camera in my hands again so here’s a few of the photographs I made. It was the perfect spot to end a perfect day in the company of a wonderful friend.

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New starts

Cough, cough. Cough, cough. Excuse me whilst I let the clouds of dust settle for a moment ……..

new-starts

Snowdrops are some of the most determined yet delicate plants to have in the garden, a symbol of how nature battles on regardless to signal that new seasons are on the horizon. Time for new starts.

These snowdrops were crying out to be shared with the world a short while before the house sitters moved in and we start a new travel adventure for a few weeks. Seems a good a time as any to see if I can rekindle my blogging life as a domestic executive that has been so illusive since I wrote my last post.

So here goes…….

Holding on to what is precious in life

Amongst the jumble in my head is a crystal clear picture. It often pops up uninvited but mostly I call on it when I need to find light in what feels like a dark place in life. It looks something like this.

FortnumI lean into the memory of Fortnum’s quizzical look. His determined stare. The padding of those massive paws along the wooden floors. The vibrations as he ran along. The sight of Fortnum sitting on the front veranda, sniffing the breeze. A glance out the window to watch our big basset examining every blade of grass along the boundary. A curled up ball of basset hound, nose to tail sleeping peacefully. A squished face, wrinkles and jowls contorted. A contented sigh. The beat of his tail as I sing his song. An indignant pout after being told off. A silent companion by my desk. Always close by watching over me.  My big basset hound is gone but not forgotten.

The last two months have been so very painful. Some days have been an abyss of grief, guilt and forlorn, yet impossible hope, that any moment Fortnum would return from one of his adventures mythering for his dinner.

More than two months on without his physical presence everyday I hold him tight in my heart and in my mind.

In January, I dusted off my photography gear with new resolve. Alas, I only managed one basset blogging shoot before Fortnum passed away. It is with pride and joy I share this last photographic adventure with my two boys.

FortnumBassets 2015-01-08 (7) Bassets 2015-01-08 (12)Whilst we miss our Big Basset more than words can say, I only imagine what it is like for Mason. He’s been been so strong finding his way in his new solo basset world. Whilst he’s always been a bit of a mummy’s boy, he stays even closer now. Despite all our efforts and medication he has been most unsettled on his own at night making it very clear that if anyone is to get any sleep the pack must be close together. So now, in the dark hours of the night, I have two sets of snores, snuffles and shuffles to contend with.

MasonOnly yesterday he ran and played with other dogs. The first time I’ve seen him do this since Fortnum left us. It was good to see him kick up his heels and see him run.

MasonThey say that grief never ends, but it changes. I know this to be true.

Life’s meaning changes when you lose a loved one. Day-to-day we still carry on with routines of eating, sleeping and working but the luxuries in life seem so unimportant. You use all your energy just to get through the day. Although still interested in my domestic executive ways – cooking, baking, gardening, making photographs – my heart just has not been in over recent weeks.

To give you a sense of how this has been for me – there is no ironing pile. My free time has moved from nurturing my creativity in the garden, kitchen or in writing to a simple repetitive task that requires little focus and effort. Seeming productive in such a mundane way is about all the life’s purpose I could muster for a while.

Fortnum’s life was too short but it was full of all the things he loved – eating, sofa time, running, sniffing, hanging around to watch the world go by and plodding along on his daily walk. Just to watch him enjoy his life brought us so much joy. He also gave us companionship, friendship and that unconditional love that makes you a better person as a result.

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As Mason starts to kick up his heels it’s probably a sign that it’s time for us to find fun in life again. To live life harder. To make more effort and find a new way.

If the depth of grief is the price of the love you feel, it’s one pain I never want to go away. If I hold on tight to the memories and remember the good times, those precious moments feel real again and make me smile.

Bassets 2013-10-28

The pain of earthquakes in life

It doesn’t take much for the vivid memories of the Christchurch earthquake to come flooding back. Four years on, my body still floods with adrenalin when I least expect. The heavy rumbling of a bus passing a bookshop last week momentarily set me looking for somewhere to hide. Strange really, because when it comes to real earthquakes that we do get from time to time, I feel strong and confident in the knowledge of what to expect.

Aside from the lingering sense of nervousness, the after effects of the Christchurch earthquake only show up in my outlook on life. Facing a life threatening situation does wonders for your sense of perspective of what’s important and what’s not. Although there is a big wide world to experience and embrace, ultimately it is only those you love and care about that really matter most.

Ten days ago our world was shook up and thrown down in the most brutal way. The aftershocks are painful and I need more strength than I have within me now to write much about it yet. But, the painful fact is that on 12 February we said farewell to our Big Basset, Fortnum. Yes, our larger than life hound is gone from our lives. It was fast from a cancer we didn’t know he had.

Fortnum 2013-05-09

I am mad as hell about what’s happened and bereft at the enormous gap that can never be filled. Fortnum’s life was full but too short, he was 7 and a half.

It’s not like you can ever prepare yourself for the loss of a loved one but the nature of Big Basset’s passing has deepened the shock and grief. Our daily routines that seemed so important before have fallen away, partly because they are a constant reminder of Fortnum but mostly because they just don’t seem to matter any more.

Our bassets arrived as a pair. A big one and a little one. A noisy one and a quiet one. One that runs and another that trots. They were a perfect balance, each with their own personalities and foibles but as a package they couldn’t be better matched. Even their names only really make sense when spoken together.

Little basset is doing well but he’s never had to be a solo basset. Emotionally and practically we have massive challenges ahead. We’re taking it one day at a time. People tell me it will get easier but so far the pain just dulls until a little aftershock arrives and the grief rolls over in overwhelming waves.

Mason says it all with big deep sighs. It’s like an expulsion of air to take the edge of the hurt. A safety valve for the pressure that builds inside.

Intellectually I know that over time things will get better. It’s good to focus on practical things and professional work. Distracting the mind fools you thinking that life is OK. But it’s a fool’s game you can’t sustain.

Counting my blessings helps. Hugging Mason helps. Talking about Fortnum to all our dog loving friends helps. Crying helps. Receiving love and support from my husband, friends and family helps. The brutal truth is part of our family is gone and we just need to let grief play its gruesome game.

And when that’s done, we’ll be able to celebrate, remember and give thanks for all Fortnum brought into our lives.

Very Berry Weather

The sun has been blowing it’s own trumpet for weeks now. To the point we really could do with nature turning its thermostat down a notch or two and turn on the rainclouds for some meaningful rain to quench the thirst of the garden. Thankfully though the wet weather we had in late Spring forced a massive currant harvest this year.

The raspberries and red/blackcurrants have been going great guns. Not so much the strawberries and what little gooseberries we had disappeared one day, one assumes along with a gorged bird that must have snuck in and out the fruit caging. Kitchen gardening can be a frustrating adventure at times.

Needless to say we’ve enjoyed our haul – naked, compoted, juiced and accompanied some rather delicious ice cream. The freezer is filling up too so we can enjoy them at a later date. Whilst the supermarkets are full of the usual seasonal fare; strawberries, blueberries, stone fruit you hardly ever see currants and the raspberries are eye-wateringly expensive making what we grow at home seem all the more precious.

Just as I was settling into lazy routines the holidays are over and it’s back to work. Needless to say it’s been a shock to the system even though I do have a rather slower and more flexible return to the office than most.

It’s all well and good having time to kick-back and enjoy the break but I end up dreaming up all sorts of projects that sets my mind into overdrive and ambitions way beyond my capacity to deliver. Each day the to do list gets longer with seemingly little progress although those little ticks in the notebook indicate stuff does indeed get done.

The one place I can go for some calm is down to the garden. Watering the veges on an evening is the perfect time to allow the mind to settle, pull up a few stray weeds, curse the cat that seems to have moved into the greenhouse and dream up more ideas of what we can do with the tayberries, loganberries, boysenberries and blackberries springing into life for a few weeks time.

After a successful experiment for sugar free jam, I’m bringing the preserving pan out of retirement to conjure up a small stash for the freezer to enjoy in the darker days that will inevitably come. For now though I’m going to enjoy the evening sun with plans for a sundowner and some berry grazing straight from the bush. It’s the stuff of the good life.

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Holiday Life with Bassets

Aside from seemingly not getting the memo about having late starts over the holidays the bassets have slipped into long lazy summer days as if second nature. Their dawn chorus is a habit I’m longing to break especially as soon as they are up and had breakfast they’re back asleep in no time leaving me wide awake and no prospect of returning to my own slumbers.

For them every day is a holiday with the only variation to their usual life is greater possibility of neck rubs, more food begging opportunities and less impatient hurry up calls as we wind our way on their daily walk through one of our local haunts. No, life for bassets is pretty much the same, even their floor cushion only moves from one heat source to another, the fire in winter and sunny veranda at this time of year.

Fortnum continues to be a worry.  Since my last update he has turned up negative for every test, including a kidney scan, which is good news although leaving the vets a little baffled.  It seems that his health woes rest squarely with arthritis and aging at a faster rate than we would like. He’s all dosed up with injections and pain relief and loving new home-made gourmet food since he point-blank refuses to eat his normal tucker.  Although some people say that he will eat when he’s hungry I just tell them that they can sit and watch him lose weight by the day and see if they relent or not.

It took us a while to realise that Mason was benefiting from Fortnum’s loss of appetite and we’re wondering whether we need to swop their nick names – Big and Little basset – since our big basset is now slim and trim and the little hound looks like he’s in training for sumo wrestling. Suffice to say he is on a strict diet and meal times are fully supervised to avoid any confusion about which hound should eat what.

With all the ups and downs in our hounds life there’s been a distinct lack of basset photography so I’m so pleased that our basset calendar runs until the end of January which gives me time to get back into photographic action again.  Here’s a selection from today’s walk for those in need of  a basset fix.

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Food Gatherings – we’re up and running

Even as the tables were set and the guests arriving I could hardly believe that this event was happening. Months of research, planning and wondering were over and it was show time. Food Gatherings opened for business.

FG at The Canteen

Anyone that has hosted a party or started a venture will know what a roller coaster ride it can be. Will people come? Will they like it when they get here? What on earth was I thinking hosting an event two weeks before Christmas?

As people streamed through the doors for our inaugural taster event there was nothing else we could do but play host and follow our plan. The social whirl in the room was electrifying to watch. Seeing strangers deep in conversation and friends reunited across the table and across the room was exactly what we were trying to create. A time and space for people with busy lives to come together.

Social Whirl

It was fun but mostly it was fast.  Two hours passed in a flurry of wrapping paper, food and chatter. As people drifted home at the end of the evening it felt good although I was almost dead on my feet. All the doing and worrying was over. It was hard to avoid the natural instinct to critique and debrief as overall it was a great success with lots of people declaring their intention to return for more events.

Plans for a monthly supper club are coming together – our first is at the end of January. We’ll be taking Food Gatherings to different eateries across Wellington and curating conversations around the table. It’s an adventure in what works and learning more about what people want from Food Gatherings.

Food Gatherings Logo-01Friends, colleagues, acquaintances and complete strangers have been so enthusiastic to the idea of food gatherings its been humbling to have their support. It’s early days but I’m excited to be making this happen working together with my friend, Naomi.

If you really want to understand what it’s like to be launching a new venture you should listen to the podcast StartUp. Food Gatherings may be in a different industry and league to the launch of this podcasting company but the thoughts, challenges and dilemmas are so similar in lots of ways. It’s a fun listen – especially if you want to hear how not to pitch your business idea to a billionaire investor.

I’ll give you a sneek peek of what it’s like behind the scenes of Food Gatherings as things unfold. If you’re based in Wellington you can of course come along to one of our future events or join our Facebook page and follow our adventures vicariously.

But for now I have to curb my impatience that Wellingtonian restaurants and cafes are shut for the holidays just at the time ideas for future food gatherings are brimming over.

 

 

New year, new look, new possibilities

There’s nothing that offers more promise than starting a new diary for the year. Those empty pages yet to be populated yell freedom before appointments, commitments and fun events get added to set the year off and running.

To get that same sense of new possibilities for the blog you’ll see that we’re all spruced up with a new look. Technologically speaking too it needed to move with the times so should be easier for phone and tablet toting readers to keep up to date. You never know, this new suit of clothes might even make my wordsmithing grow.

As usual I have grand plans for the year. More reading, writing, photography and getting inspired in the kitchen. Less weeding, basset pandering and worrying about the un-ticked to do list. I’m all for living life at a much slower, richer pace.

The sun is out today to celebrate the new year. I hope wherever you are in the world that this year brings you health and happiness and all that you the good things you hope for.  HAPPY 2015.